Random Stuffs.

 Balthatzar's Birthday Cake. In all its glory. I kinda like the cartoon aspect of it with the softened edges, I have definitely made worse cakes. 
I promised pics, there they are. 


So we invested in the "Your Baby Can READ!" Program the boys watch it during breakfast about 3 times, I have so far been neglectful of the flashcard but i am getting there. When I was little I was an avid reader. I think it is because my mom set a very similar practice into play putting labels on everything, "door","chair", "wall". Those are the ones I remember.I have been trying to do that since Mordred turned about 6 months old but honestly my house ad my mind are not in a state yet where they would stand out against the havoc and chaos.
I seriously lack housekeeping skills. It frustrates me to no end that it is a vicious cycle: There is a mess, you pick up the mess when you have free time, when you don't you watch as slowly thing are deposited where convenient ( I am a huge guilty party on that one.) They never go where they belong because by the time you have free time, you find yourself quality checking the backs of your eyelids or you've worked all day and now your body has gone on strike and the only way you are standing up is if the next destination is another seat or better yet a bed. I am not yet 30 years old. I am not looking forward to being 30 years old. I don't know that I have ever felt spry, but not feeling tired, or depressed or on the brink of an anxiety attack sure would be a nice change. My family helps, no one can bring me out of anxiety attack except E. I don't know how he does it, I am not totally sure he knows how he does it, but it is soothing knowing he's around, like an epi-pen in my pocket. Mordred is becoming very empathetic, he'll give me a hug and pet my hair. It's pretty damn sweet. Balthazar gives great big questioning puppy eyes and rests his head on your knee. if it doesn't melt your heart just a little then I have to question if you have one. and then, then there is my Security Blanket, she knows 99.99% of my secrets (she may know the other .01% but I've forgotten them) and can make me laugh and feel loved no matter what. This year we are celebrating 25 years of friendship. and we best be doing something.
We had to cancel B.'s 1 year check up because of the storm. Forecast-ed something like 20", it's put off til later in the month. as long as the doctor's appointment with his specialist isn't canceled I won't be all indignant and angry. They are going to see symptoms this time, because I can see symptoms. I want to know my son is alright. (I promise to explain B.'s condition in a later post.) But for now that is everything, be well and believe. Til next time.
~a